right now might not be the best time to write this because im stoned but i need to do this soon before i forget. my session was on monday this week instead of the usual tuesday because my therapist was “traveling” this week. i didnt bother asking her where she was going, or if i did it was as a joke because after asking her about her weekend, i knew i wouldnt really get an answer.
this week i talked about how i felt like a stupid fucking jerk for leaving the giant painting gaby made at the studio to eventually get thrown out or stolen or whatever. and the way i deal with that (“that’s a loss and it fucking sucks but there’s nothing i can do about it”) is the way i deal with everything. if something is pissing me off or upsetting me, i immediately displace myself from the situation and move on. im starting to wonder if thats the best approach because i dont think it is- theres way too many unresolved feelings festering inside of me like that raisin in the sun, that dream deferred.
p.s. did you know langston hughes was gay?
umm i mentioned the childrens book im trying to make, “little things matter”
she said, ” how wonderful”
i need to think about this book some more before i write anything so ill get back to that later.
and we also talked about my ex- john mcg. i really dont like talking about because id rather just write him off as some asshole in my life and forget about him then deal with how horrible he made me feel and that he actually mattered.
anyway, my dear diary, thats all i feel like writing for now. i need to finishing watching this bette davis film i started. i like the way people look in classic picture, why dont people look like that anymore? like, classy?
